Significance
I have the type of personality which, left to it own devices will careen off the road and into whatever happens to be there. Not the speeding, X-Game watching, Ferrari driving type, but the primer painted 50s Volvo type. Not even the hip one driven by the oh-so-hip art student to their cap hill abode. Mines the fishing hat wearing type. Or maybe the absent minded professor owner. No violent end here, but just a lackadaisical, wandering list which ends inevitably with a ditch.
The sports car driver, their end was inevitable. As was the professor's. But it would appear that one of them ended up right where they intended to be.
I am tempted to say, that in my adult life, I could use the adjective "charmed" to describe it. I am not prepared to say that I have not deserved some of my meager success, but in some ways, things have fallen into place at times which were quite fortuitous. For example, losing a job by, probably, my own doing only to find a much better opportunity. Meeting someone of significance when the time was right. Or Wrong. Tricky one those people meetings.
With that in mind, I am a creature of leisure. I am admittedly lazy in regards to mundane activities. I don't like to clean. I am not good at making plans or keeping a check book. If given the opportunity to slack, in any way, I will likely already be doing so.
Here is the rub I am facing in my life right now:
I am just "getting by". My vocation is such, that I am completely uninspired. I'll tell you that other than from a purely problem solving point of view, (me overcoming the problems related to the job), I don't see reward here. But should I? Is it a right to enjoy what you do? Or are there some that will always toil.
I should say here, that I don't consider what I do "toiling". Really, its sort of with a whining tone that I divulge here how I'm feeling. Why? Because honestly, my ideal would be to not work. Be wealthy, travel, entertain. I'm selfish at times, but I still believe that there is no greater calling than to the service of others. But I want to provide service on a very different, (read leisurely) level.
So its recently that I am affording myself the time to consider my options. Truly I have many more than most people.
The sports car driver, their end was inevitable. As was the professor's. But it would appear that one of them ended up right where they intended to be.
I am tempted to say, that in my adult life, I could use the adjective "charmed" to describe it. I am not prepared to say that I have not deserved some of my meager success, but in some ways, things have fallen into place at times which were quite fortuitous. For example, losing a job by, probably, my own doing only to find a much better opportunity. Meeting someone of significance when the time was right. Or Wrong. Tricky one those people meetings.
With that in mind, I am a creature of leisure. I am admittedly lazy in regards to mundane activities. I don't like to clean. I am not good at making plans or keeping a check book. If given the opportunity to slack, in any way, I will likely already be doing so.
Here is the rub I am facing in my life right now:
I am just "getting by". My vocation is such, that I am completely uninspired. I'll tell you that other than from a purely problem solving point of view, (me overcoming the problems related to the job), I don't see reward here. But should I? Is it a right to enjoy what you do? Or are there some that will always toil.
I should say here, that I don't consider what I do "toiling". Really, its sort of with a whining tone that I divulge here how I'm feeling. Why? Because honestly, my ideal would be to not work. Be wealthy, travel, entertain. I'm selfish at times, but I still believe that there is no greater calling than to the service of others. But I want to provide service on a very different, (read leisurely) level.
So its recently that I am affording myself the time to consider my options. Truly I have many more than most people.
